I was discharged from sick bay today, following my run in with the alien creature.
Bones insisted I stay overnight for observation, which I initially refused to do.
I relented when he told me that whilst I was unconscious, the creature successfully inserted a mating tentacle into what it mistakenly thought to be my birth canal. He said that I needed to be probed to make sure I had not been ‘contaminated’
When I asked him why he didn’t use a Tricorder, as oppose to the painful rectal probe, he mumbled something about alien residue causing inaccurate readings.
This was strange, as none of the other crew members readings were affected.
Today, I can barely walk.
I need to order a new green top from supplies.
posted by Captain Berk @ 11:36 am
6 Comments:
You had better get two green tops while you are at it!
heh heh!
Being probed is always painful. Remember how close to pleasure that pain is, and you should be okay..
That sounds like a "bad touch". Better make sure he did'nt take any video. You wouldn't want that popping up on the internet.
Trinity: I tried, but the stores said they all got fired out of the airlock by accident. He said all they had left were pink ones. I'm sure I saw scotty wearing a brand new red one on my way back to the bridge.
Ultra: Thank you for your kind words. I'll think happy thought when i go back for my next probe next week.
Prof X: I asked Bones, and he said he had to for official starfleet records. As it is an 'unusual case' the footage needs to be studied by the admiralty. I guess i'll just have to trust him.
There seems to be a distinct difficulty in being able to get the right outfit. I can replicate mine and never have to do the laundry.
Jean Luc: Our replicators are unreliable. Last time i tried that, I got a pantomime horse costume. Then all the ships systems went down, so I had no choice but to wear said costume on the bridge during a complex negociation with the klingon high command.
I almost got demoted
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